You didn’t love me enough not to hurt me in this way
I should have known better
It’s not like I ever really trusted you anyway
But you kept lying
I had so much doubt
I was full of it, for good reason
I loved you as best I could
You didn’t love me enough
I wasn’t enough for you
Yet really, I was too much for you
Men who love their wives
Don’t fall for other women
You fell for her because you didn’t keep your heart full of me
My love was wasted on you
A man who is too much of a fool to see just how good he had it
Life is what we make it
You left again.
Walked out the door, leaving your wife and child behind in tears.
I know you won’t be coming back this time.
I want it this way.
In this moment, I truly never want to see you again.
I know it’s not my fault. I do know this.
After all, no one tried harder than me to fix what was broken.
If nothing else, that’s something you can’t take from me.
Everyone knows how hard I tried.
The same cannot be said for you.
I know all this, yet I am still ashamed.
You couldn’t love me for who I am, because who I am is too much for you.
So you walked away.
Before you left, you tried to make me small so you could feel big.
I let you.
Until I just couldn’t lose myself in you anymore.
Who am I without you?
Whoever I want to be, no longer encumbered by the depths of you.
Nothing could have prepared me for the moment my husband told me he didn’t love me anymore.
I inhaled sharply as I listened to the words tumbling out of his mouth. “I love you, but I’m not in love with you anymore,” he said.
Click to read the rest of my post My Husband Asked Me To Commit to a Loveless Marriage published on YourTango.com.
They sat together, side-by-side, in the wooden chairs he had built.
Two friends who used to be lovers.
Bundled up in winter coats, hands stuffed into deep pockets.
They sat and talked like they hadn’t in years.
Cold, yet not ready to go inside, both knowing it would bring the conversation, the lingering of what they once meant to each other, to an end.
Neither one ready for it to end.
The quiescence of tear stained apologies and forgiveness blanketed them in warmth.
Two people who still cared deeply, but couldn’t be together.
As they sat, they both saw it.
A single star shooting across the black canvas of night, trailing magical dust behind it.
A faded star, once shining so brightly, but now the light was gone, never to shine again.
Never to shine again.