Scattered

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My thoughts are so scattered

I just want to cry

I can’t gain focus

My head is spinning

I shift from one thing to the next

Reaching, wanting, just needing something to be done,

to check it off the list,

to feel like I have done something,

that there is order

Spin, spin, spin

Repeat

Nothing gets done

I turn the volume up

Wanting the music to crowd out the noise in my head

Fail

The thoughts persist

Scattered as they are,

scattered they remain

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Story to Tell

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I have a story to tell, one of strength and sorrow

I’ve started it in my head more times than I can count

Even tried to write some of it down a time or two

It never comes out the way I imagine

 

It’s long, complicated, and difficult to know where to begin

My story is so much more than a failed marriage,

and working mother anecdotes

It’s how I became who I am

Yet instead of writing about it, I stall