Access Denied 

 

I wait

On edge

For what’s to come

I try not to let him get to me

But as hard as I try

He knows my weak spot

It’s our son

And so he tugs

I try not to bend

I want to lash out at him

But I can’t, and I won’t

Except it still gets to me

The anger keeps me up most the night

I must do better

Try harder

I changed the locks today

Because he has no concept of boundaries

And I needed to take back some control

I tell myself it will help steady me

For his inevitable blows

He no longer has the same level of access

To the coming and goings of my life

Access, denied

He may like playing games

He thinks it’s funny

Me, as his pawn

But I just want it to end

Start living my life the way I want

To begin

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s